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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29667717">Finally Happy in the Having</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/smiledean/pseuds/smiledean'>smiledean</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Supernatural</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Kissing, Love Confessions, M/M, Movie Night, Post-Canon, Post-Canon Fix-It, post 15x18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 23:28:38</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,646</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29667717</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/smiledean/pseuds/smiledean</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Cas returns from the Empty and Dean needs to tell him how he feels. A movie night with just the two of them may be the perfect opportunity.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Castiel &amp; Dean Winchester, Castiel/Dean Winchester</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>9</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>91</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Finally Happy in the Having</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It had been almost a week since Cas returned from the Empty. Sam and Dean greeted him with open arms, but an unspoken reciprocation lingered in Dean's embrace. He needed to tell Cas how he felt, especially after everything Cas had been through. But he couldn't bring himself to do it, not yet, and especially not with Sam around. He needed some more time to process.</p><p>There was little interaction after their reunion, anyway, once Cas found out what happened to Jack. Cas needed to go see him and Dean was grateful for the time to recalibrate. He feared opening up to Cas and he feared letting himself be happy. Dean didn't want things to necessarily change between the two of them, but he also didn't want to not explore what could be their future.</p><p>Cas returned from visiting Jack four days later. Luckily, Sam was around again, so Dean and Cas weren't alone just yet. He couldn't keep avoiding Cas, but he also needed to ease into it and be prepared - have it be on his call.</p><p>After Cas gave an update on Jack, they all went to their separate rooms. Dean just sat on his bed, thinking. He quickly realized that with Cas back, all he wanted to do was spend time with him. He was his best friend after all. After some more agonizing minutes of stress, Dean mustered up the courage to finally suggest spending time with Cas. He flopped back in his bed, groaned, and then got back up to make his way to Cas's room.</p><p>Dean knocked lightly on Cas's door. "Hey Cas?"</p><p>There was a minute of silence, then footsteps, and finally Cas opened the door. He looked tired but lit up upon seeing Dean's small smile.</p><p>"Hello, Dean. What's going on?" Cas asked, of course with his signature head tilt. <em>Man, I missed him</em>, Dean thought.</p><p>Dean rubbed the back of his neck and made the mistake of making a quick glance at Cas's lips. He could kiss him right now. <em>Don't ruin it, </em>Dean thought in protest. As much as he knew both he and Cas probably wanted it, he figured they needed to take it slow.</p><p>"Let's have a movie night, just the two of us," Dean suggested, hoping Cas would agree without asking any further questions. Sam was going out with Eileen tonight; this was their chance to be alone with time for Dean to prepare.</p><p>"Sure, Dean, I'd love that," Cas said with a smile. He could sense Dean's tension, but also understood the position they were currently in. To finally give in and have what they both wanted for so long seemed daunting and a bit undeserving. That is, given if Dean even felt the same way.  </p><p>They continued to stare at each other for another moment and then Dean gave Cas's doorframe a tap with his hand. "See you at the Dean Cave at 8 o'clock, then. I'll bring the beers and the popcorn." Before Cas could say anything else, Dean made his way back to his room to freak out a little more for a couple of hours.</p><p>At 7:45, Dean changed into a t-shirt and pajama bottoms and headed to the kitchen to grab the aforementioned beers and popcorn. Was he panicking? <em>Yes. </em>Will the beer help? <em>Hopefully.</em></p><p>Thankfully, the Dean Cave was empty when he arrived, so Dean had time to set everything up. He recently found a couch at a thrift shop, so now in between the two recliners was an old loveseat. <em>What a silly name</em>, Dean thought as he tossed a couple blankets on the couch and placed the popcorn and drinks on the table.</p><p>He still hadn't picked a movie, but he knew he wanted something not obviously romantic but also not a total horror and violence flick - they experienced enough of that for a few lifetimes. Dean scrolled through the Netflix and after a minute, he heard Cas come in.</p><p>"Hi Cas, I haven't picked out a movie yet-" Dean stopped talking as he turned to look at Cas. His mouth opened a bit in surprise as he took in the sight in front of him. Cas was wearing one of Dean's Led Zeppelin shirts and his hot dog pajama pants.</p><p>"Is everything alright?" Cas asked, looking down at himself and back up at Dean worried.</p><p>"No, no, everything's good. It’s just…I can’t believe you are actually wearing my clothes.” Dean rubbed his hand over his face, hiding a smile behind it.</p><p>“You usually dress comfy for these movie nights,” Cas said, using air quotes around the word ‘comfy’. “So, I saw these clean clothes in the laundry room and thought I’d give it a try.” He hesitantly made his way over to his side of the couch. Dean smiled and patted the seat next to him and Cas settled himself in. He realized he was still staring at Cas and quickly turned back to the TV. <em>Damn, he looks good in my clothes,</em> Dean thought.</p><p>Dean cleared his throat – and his mind. “As I was saying, I hadn’t picked a movie yet so I’m up for suggestions,” he said, gesturing to the Netflix screen. Cas grabbed one of the blankets and draped it over his lap and squinted at the options.</p><p>“There’s one of the Batman movies,” Cas pointed at the screen. “You like that, right? I don’t think I’ve seen it yet.”</p><p>“Yeah, sure, we can watch that,” Dean agreed, lifting the remote to start the movie. It was a dark movie, but also an easy one for both of them to watch.</p><p>The two were silent for the first hour of the movie. They sat a foot away from each other, under their respective blankets, just sipping on their beers. Then, Dean’s eyes started to droop. He began to blink in and out of consciousness as the movie played on. It didn’t help that the room was warm and the fact that he felt completely safe with Cas next to him…</p><p>Dean felt fingers running softly through his hair. They were gentle, soothing. Suddenly, he opened his eyes, remembering where he was and what he was previously doing. Sensing Dean’s jerk awake, Cas removed his hands from Dean and looked down at him. Dean turned his head to meet Cas’s eyes.</p><p>“I’m sorry Dean, I didn’t mean to alarm you. You fell asleep and your face almost fell into the popcorn, so I figured this would be a more comfortable place,” Cas explained, motioning to his blanketed lap. Dean felt bad about how guilty Cas sounded. The truth was, Dean hadn’t felt that comfortable or been touched like that in a very long time.</p><p>“Don’t apologize. Do that again. Please.” Dean whispered the last word as he turned his head back towards the movie. It was near the end, so he must’ve been sleeping for at least an hour.</p><p>“This?” Cas asked as he began stroking Dean’s hair again.</p><p>“Yeah, it feels really nice, Cas. Um, thank you.” Dean closed his eyes and stayed still, feeling the softness run through his hair and through his body. He knew what he wanted to say then, and he hoped he could get it out right.</p><p>"Hey, Cas?" Dean called out.</p><p>"Mm?"</p><p>"I, uh, need you to know that...even though I pulled back a little after you returned...I do want it. I do want us. I was scared. Of course I was scared. You know I don't let myself be happy." Dean paused and took a deep breath. He pushed himself off of Cas's lap and turned to face him on the couch. He wanted to look Cas in the eye when he said what came next. Cas stared at Dean, his blue eyes wide and soft in both curiosity and anticipation.</p><p>"Cas, I love you. I love you and I can't lose you again. You mean everything to me, and I want to show you that every day for the rest of my life. You can have me. You can have all of me if you want to." Dean brought up his hand to Cas’s cheek, his eyes tearing up.</p><p>“Dean, are you sure?” Cas clearly didn’t want Dean to be saying this just because of his confession.</p><p>“Yes, Cas, positive.” Dean then leaned in and gave Cas a kiss. It was hesitant and light, but everything Dean could have ever wanted.</p><p>The two parted slightly. Their breathing was heavy, and pulses were racing. Dean never felt this way about a kiss before, especially one that was so PG. “Cas is this al-“ Dean started ask, but suddenly Cas crashed his lips back on Dean’s.</p><p>The two of them started to kiss hungrily. They grabbed at each other, desperate to hold on and never let go. Dean fell back onto the couch as Cas straddled him, finding new places to kiss Dean every second. Even though Dean was very much enjoying this, he didn’t want to make Cas rush into anything. He pushed Cas off of him slightly.</p><p>“Hey, hey, I don’t mind taking it slow, you know. Don’t think we have to jump into anything. I already told you I’m all yours.” Dean said, catching his breath.</p><p>“Dean, I think we’ve been taking it slow long enough, don’t you? We have the rest of our lives to talk. Right now, all I want is <em>you.</em>” Cas’s voice got even deeper at the last word.</p><p>Cas was right. They deserved this, and it was long overdue. Dean smiled and nodded in agreement. He then pulled Cas back down to him. All the fears and hesitations Dean had earlier that day melted away with every kiss. This was it. They were finally able to be happy in the having and Dean was so ready to have it all with Cas.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thank you so much for reading!<br/>Follow me on tumblr @smiledean</p></blockquote></div></div>
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